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07 October 2011 @ 06:21 pm
It's like Jin all over again...  
Here I though this day would actually be good.

No school, some shopping, moving some stuff to our apartment. And then the bad news.

Had to lock myself in to the bathroom to get over the worst part of tears before I could face my parents again.

I don't really know what to say. Thinking back about this year and the last, there has been nothing good except Kisumai's debut. All the other stuff has been shit. Except maybe Ebisu's concert. But still.

Made me partly think why do we love this fandom so much, when praxtically all it gives to us is shit? Don't get me wrong, i'm not quitting this fandom. No way of that happening.

Right now I feel so empty. NEWS was my first jpop group. Pi was my first je crush. haha, I feel sort of betrayed. ;__; It's Jin all over again. Only this time it's not one, but two. :(

There went the chances of me seeing NEWS live. As six (most likely at all). But guess we'll get over this, with time? We've gotten through every shitty thing anyway.

Thank you guys, you can't even imagine how much happiness you've given me in these years i've been in this fandom. I appreciate it. Hope you will do well in the future. ♥

(And their jnet page looks really empty now. ;;______;;)
Current Location: home.
Current Mood: sadsad
Current Music: none. no, not even NEWS.
chained_akame: Ryo-chanchained_akame on October 7th, 2011 08:46 pm (UTC)
I agree on everything except the "Pi was my first je crush". And I can understand Ryo,I really can. Not because he's my favourite but because his schedule indeed wasn't ok and fair. But Yamapi...I don't think I will be able to forgive him.
Laurahinodesol on October 7th, 2011 08:54 pm (UTC)
un, i understand ryo, i really do. i think right now i just want to find smth to blame so that i could get over this. i feel so empty and dead and i can't function well. and it didn't really help that when i was trying to pack my things today so much news stuff from my early fandom days jumped to my face from my closets. ;______;

but i hope you will be able to forgive pi someday too. i don't blame either of them, i respect their decisions, even though they hurt. a lot. like i did with jin. things will change, once again, news will never be the same. but you forgave jin, right? you should forgive pi too. he did what jin did, he's not better, not worse than him. so don't think badly of him please? he's a human like us.

i think i just need to go to bed and maybe i can actually think tomorrow. good night, let's talk about this later okay? everything feels a bit better when you can talk about it with someone.
chained_akame: Ryo-chanchained_akame on October 7th, 2011 09:03 pm (UTC)
To be honest, there are times where I know I still haven't forgiven Jin completely. Especially now that he's debuting with someone else's song. I mean,was this really what he wanted? A debut like that? Was this really the reason he left KAT-TUN? But anyway,this is about NEWS....back to Yamapi,he was never someone I liked,so it was really easy to put the blame on him. He did exactly what Jin did,assured us that everything would be alright and that he wouldn't betray us and then BAM! he goes solo. I understand Ryo's decision,but I can't and won't accept Yamapi's. I just know I won't. Maybe it's because in KAT-TUN's case, Jin left but the other five had enough strength to go on. But NEWS...they had already lost 3 members,so I never expected Yamapi to make such a selfish move.

Yeah,let's talk more tomorrow. Unless of course you feel like not listening to me because I seriously can't sit and listen to people trying to find excuses for Pi. Goodnight *gives a big hug*
Laurahinodesol on October 7th, 2011 09:07 pm (UTC)
/was still awake to check this comment.

i understand that you don't like pi, and that's no reason for me not to want to talk with you. there're lots of people disliking pi. and yes, i think it is not as 'safe' for pi to leave as it was for jin. kat-tun still had lots of strength. i doubt news will have that much. especially with tegomass having so many activities. i worry a lot for koyashige. :(

ah, srsly. i'll go to bed like i said. we'll continue later. Nights~! *hugs you back* i need hugs so much right now... D:
chained_akame: Ryo-chanchained_akame on October 7th, 2011 09:29 pm (UTC)
exactly. Plus, Yamapi was supposedly the leader of NEWS...I can't imagine how hard it is for the remaining 4 to see themselves losing one member after another...at least Ryo's act was not a selfish one,in contrast with Yamapi...

but yes,later :) I'll go write some fics^^